techritic

Facebook’s Design: Not That Great, So Stop Copying It

techritic — Wed, 11 Jun 2008 17:10:24 +0000

I’ve been browsing the blogs for about five minutes, and I see two articles that refer to design inspired by Facebook’s design:

You DON’T need to emulate a social network that is going to shit. Last.fm: your design right now is fine. Focus on site optimization. Microsoft: why?

OBTW, Facebook sucks.

Fuck the iPhone

techritic — Wed, 11 Jun 2008 14:38:22 +0000

“And, The Really Big Thing About The New iPhone Is…”

…gps!!!!1111LOLOLOOENOENONO!11

It’s called a phone with a fucking GPS. Revolutionary? I think not. Cut the bullshit and shut the fuck up about the iPhone being “revolutionary.”

Facebook Has No Sense of Business

techritic — Mon, 02 Jun 2008 19:00:29 +0000

Facebook just now released their Facebook Platform offering as an open-source Facebook Open Platform. Basically, it went like this:

LOLOLOLOLOLOLOL IM FACEBOOK AND IM GONNA RELEASE DIS SHIT FOR FREE AND ITS LIEK LOLOLOL IMA BE STUPID AND SHIT AND LOLOO THE VCS WONT CARE THAT WERE GIVIN GAWAY GFEREE FINROMATION TO R COMPETIETURS!!!!!!!1111!oneoneon!1ONeeleleven!11

That’s how Facebook works anyway, so I shouldn’t be surprised. What dipshits. I’d definitely like to see this information, it’s just that they have no idea what they’re doing. THE “NEW WEB” ISN’T ANY DIFFERENT FROM THE SENSE OF COMPETITION FROM THE “OLD WAY OF DOING BUSINESS.” NOW GTFO MY INTERNETS.

NYT: Remember, Zuckerberg Doesn’t Listen, and why 37signals sucks

techritic — Fri, 30 May 2008 16:50:13 +0000

The New York Times recently posted an article that outlined some suggestions that Zuckerberg take into consideration to prepare for a possible IPO, or just as general suggestions. Remember NYT — Zuck Doesn’t Listen. Kind of like how 37signals doesn’t listen and gives a no to almost every feature request because they’re so fucking naive and want the product to go into the direction that they want it to go into so that they can achieve their vision of Basecamp or any other 37signals product. (Fucking long link, but you don’t even have to click it now, because that’s the summary of it.)

You might think that Facebook is listening to their customers via the Profile Redesign, but it’s more like “umm.. ok we’ll change that but now shut the fuck up” kind of thing.

You have to listen to the customer. The customer defines where your product is going. Not you.

Why Mark Zuckerberg is an Idiot

techritic — Fri, 30 May 2008 16:39:53 +0000

As New York Times posts an article called “Who’s Smarter: Bill Gates or Mark Zuckerberg?” I almost experienced indigestion. The article itself kind of also sucks, as it fails to talk about why each of them could be “smarter” but simply about the classes that they skipped in Harvard. However, it’s valuable to consider the question. And here’s the answer:

Bill Gates is better. Why? Microsoft is actually profitable. And has a market cap of $264bn. Microsoft builds their service from the distribution of software for personal and business use.

Mark Zuck’s Facebook is FAR from profitable. Social advertising? They fucked it up. Social networking may be the future, but Facebook isn’t the flagship product.

Let’s not pull an NYT and totally forget about the headline. Mark Zuck has fucked up their social advertising, which is basically their only way of profitability (other than sponsorships, which is basically advertising.) I don’t know if anyone will start to embrace their social advertising platform again, but I hope not, because it fucking sucks. Beacon fails. Nice privacy features there. Social Ads (or “Flyers Pro” or whatever the fuck) suck and they don’t work. Social advertising on Faceboook FAILS.

That’s under the ‘leadership’ of Mark Zuck. Beacon was a big mistake? NO SHIT! I think he can start to make insights such as “A technology business is a business — that builds technology.” Facebook is nice, as a non-profit. Zuck isn’t the leader for Facebook, as we’ve seen.

BEFORE YOU LOLOLOLOL LIKE A NOOB IN THE COMMENTS — I fucking know that Facebook is a team and it’s not just Zuck. No shit, but what is Microsoft without Ballmer? The leader is what — holy shit — leads an organization, and what defines its focus. If you think otherwise, or think that Zuck has not that much influence on Facebook, you’re just a fucking idiot.

Now get the fuck off my internets.

Zuckerberg reveals himself as a genius

techritic — Thu, 29 May 2008 19:06:04 +0000

At D6, Zuckerberg has revealed himself as a genius among business owners and programmers. He has broken from his shell of not revealing anything, and has given us the following amazingly insightful thoughts:

Facebook is a technology company … a technology company is a company that creates technology

Religion, that’s a big thing around the world

Zuckerberg’s new insights are brilliant, and will change the world forever as more and more technology companies stop producing cat food, and start producing — you guessed it — technology. WOWOWOWOW

Is that a question?

Via.

Facebook IPO? Get Ready To Short

techritic — Sun, 25 May 2008 21:49:54 +0000

So, we’re hearing talk about a Facebook IPO. HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA

Seriously, what the fuck is up with this shit about a Facebook IPO? The moment I see NYSE:FBOOK on Yahoo! IPOs, I’m going to take my TD Ameritrade account, plug in FBOOK, and short 1,000 shares. What the fuck are people thinking?

Also, to the VCs that invested in Facebook (Founders Fund, Hong Kong guy, Microsoft) when Facebook IPOs, throw a fucking party, wait for the initial investor buy-in and stock rising, and then SELL ALL YOUR STOCK. Seriously, you don’t want anything to do with this stock.

Let’s take a look at expected stock performance chart after a year or so:

Oh, shit, did I accidentally put in Webvan‘s stock chart here? Sorry about that.

Facebook is nothing but a social networking website, and while it has Applications where you can throw a hamburger to a friend, that doesn’t make it anything more. It’s NOT a software platform. It’s NOT the new “social operating system” or whatever you dumbasses talk about. It’s a fucking social networking website. Seeing a MySpace IPO? Me neither. Get sold to Microsoft or some shit, Facebook, and get out of the scene.

Microsoft: Offer Your Damn $37/share And Get This Over With

techritic — Wed, 07 May 2008 02:50:47 +0000

To Microsoft: offer frickin $37/share and quit pissing off YHOO shareholders. You need Yahoo!, Yahoo! needs Microsoft to be a viable competitor against Google. Otherwise, you will always be battling each other and not getting anything done, while you fight out the 20% of the market that is left. Get your fucking act together, quit pissing off shareholders, and BUY.

[Apple] Universal iPhone IM Patent

techritic — Tue, 22 Apr 2008 02:28:08 +0000

Seen on AppleInsider: Apple files for universal iPhone instant messaging patent

Apple has filed a large number of stupid, generic patents, and this is one of them. Not stupid that it won’t work and is a bad idea, but stupid that Apple is trying to patent everything under the sun, obviously trying to take up all of the patents for themselves. Absolutely crazy.